When I was young,
I used to
Watch behind
the curtains
As men walked
up and down the street. Wino men, old men.
Young men sharp
as mustard.
See them. Men
are always
Going somewhere.
They knew I
was there. Fifteen
Years old and
starving for them.
Under my window,
they would pauses,
Their shoulders
high like the
Breasts of
a young girl,
Jacket tails
slapping over
Those behinds,
Men.
One day they
hold you in the
Palms of their
hands, gentle, as if you
Were the last
raw egg in the world. Then
They tighten
up. Just a little. The
First squeeze
is nice. A quick hug.
Soft into your
defenselessness. A little
More. The hurt
begins. Wrench out a
Smile that
slides around the fear. When the
Air disappears,
Your mind pops,
exploding fiercely, briefly,
Like the head
of a kitchen match. Shattered.
It is your
juice
That runs down
their legs. Staining their shoes.
When the earth
rights itself again,
And taste tries
to return to the tongue,
Your body has
slammed shut. Forever.
No keys exist.
Then the window
draws full upon
Your mind.
There, just beyond
The sway of
curtains, men walk.
Knowing something.
Going someplace.
But this time,
I will simply
Stand and watch.
Maybe.